Me, Myself and a girl named .....

My photo
Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
She sits alone in a smoke filled cafe. Watching as the world goes by.. She has the looks that tell the truths when she lies. She says she's all your dreams are made of..and everything that you'll never understand... And since you're lost, perhaps you can step inside and stay a while.."Welcome to the 100% Satisfaction Eh?!".

Friday, August 28, 2009


Nurul, since u're asking for an, I opt to discuss on one.. I picked this topic " Tattoos"

When I was in highschool, I had a few schoolmates who had tattoos below their knees and arms , if I'm not mistaken. When asked, they said It's a custom/tradition for their people to have tattoos drawn ( or plotted?) on the body..which I can understand the reason why..

As you can see, having tattoos has becoming one of the trends/cultures/interests among young generations nowadays
(arghh why am I feeling like I'm writing an english essay here?)

They may have various of reasons doing so..which I don't understand why..


Is it for self-satisfaction?
or for a show off thingy?<-- cuz you think you'll look cool if you have tattoos on your body?
or you're doing it because it's a popular thing-people-do these days?
or to remember someone important in life so you dedicate a special space at some part of the body?
or without any specific reason at all? you're doing it out of curiosity..and afraid that you'll regret for the rest of life.. for not doing it as you're getting old..??

Don't get me wrong, and don't take it seriously.I'm not being a sarcastic, prejudice or whatever you'll call it.. I'm just trying to come up with an interesting issue to be discussed in here..

In a way, dwell on this topic I might care or 'rajin' enough to talk bout it..ha ha

Note from author : I don't mean to insult or offend the readers of this blog with this issue. Any comments and feedbacks from you guys are most welcomed.

Interesting Issues??

Selamat Pagi...

OMG! Since I came back from the trip, I wasn't able to get a good sleep.. and Somebody told me that I had the Panda look now (because of the eyebag under my eyes) which I don't think it has anything to do with the fasting month..
I've been having this what-you-called-Insomania thingy since I was a student..but it was few years ago..
This week reviews, I didn't make any progress neither at the office nor in daily life.. what a mess is my life now.
Owhkay..cut off those complains!

I've never been in this situation before, where everything I do, or did would just lead me into troubles and more trouble..Life is getting more complicated each days. And I don't even know what should I do now.. What I realized about myself until this moment is I am becoming such an annoying and irritating person which is not the real me. What's more important, it's affecting everyone around me..Hell if I know what's gotten me.
Again, cut off those complains please!

By the way, Nurul suggested that I should write more interesting issues in my blog..
Now,now.. this is the most difficult part..
To write something interesting, requires a lot of information.. And to get those informations mean I need to read more.. And for me to read impossible!
I hate news, and furthermore I hate reading newspapers and anything that has to do with facts.. How do you determine what's interesting and what's not?
Hmm... this is an interesting issue (Wow.. I've got a point here)

Anyone with suggestions in mind ?

Thursday, August 27, 2009

10 Things I Hate about You

I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair
I hate the way you drive my car

I hate it when you stare

I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind
I hate you so much that it makes me sick

It even makes me ryhme

I hate the way you're always right
I hate it when you lie
I hate it when you make me laugh

Even worse when you make me cry

I hate the way you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call

But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.
(taken from the movie, 10 things I hate about you)

Note : I almost forgot about this one..One of my fave-to-watch movie back in highschool..OMG! (cried in frantic)

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

My Wishlist

Good day!
I was thinking about this when I had a long good puff a while ago.. My Wishlist for 2009/10

  1. Keeping a long hair (no matter how tempting it is for me to go for a haircut each time i pass by the Hair Saloon)
  2. Reduce Smoking (eventhough it's impossible/the most difficult part of me,yet gotta go for it gal)
  3. Achieve ideal weight --> 55kg before my next birthday (I can do this, and I have confidence in myself for it)
  4. Beat KYLim (He is my superior at my department) on Structural Design .
  5. Change everyone's perception on me - including peoples at the office, friends, families and ..... someone out there.. you know who you are
  6. Buying a pair of Levi's Jean, the size of 28
  7. Less Sugar taking in drinks
  8. Becoming more positive in everything in life
  9. Gain more for human skill
  10. Becoming more feminine as somebody told me that I look like a tomboy
  11. Get rid off the old habits
  12. Spend more time on socializing with ppl out there
  13. Get myself a social buddy
  14. Get myself a group of social buddies
  15. Buy a new pair of Crocs
  16. Dating more ?!
  17. Pamper myself with Spa and Facial stuff
  18. Settle all the things which has been bothering me before year end
  19. Stop behaving like a stupid and start to behave like a wise person
  20. Extreme makeover..just wait and see guys.. you'll be suprised

Wow?! What a long list I've made here...

"Hey..Now, now...Watch your mouth!"

"Puk*mak budak ni, camne kau boleh hilang!" (or in translation) " **** you, where on earth have you been?"

This is one of the few sentences I remember when a child walking at Pasar Malam ( Night Market), a mother scolding her own child in front of a group of people.

WORD CHOICE: puk*mak, why would u swear on your own pussy or how do u name it?

But to think on this issue again, why is such word a bad word? Word like S.H.I.T, F.U.C.K, cibai, lanchau, puki, etc... I mean, they don't mean bad things, or do they?

So what qualifies as a swear word? S.H.I.T means "ship high in transit" (but refers to of course shit/dung), F.U.C.K stands for "for unlawful carnal knowledge", cibai, lanchau, puki is a reference towards human's private parts. What's so bad with these words? Why are these words "blocked out" on Malaysian tv for example? Why?? Maybe because they were taboo "back then"?

Well, I don't use swear words on a freuqent basis, so that's a good start right.

My opinion on this? I don't think it's bad, maybe just inappropriate. You wouldn't want your kids to say all those things now do u?

So as I use to say to friends who do swear ", now.. Watch ur mouth!"

It's ridiculous..isn't it?

It's the 4th day of the fasting month, and all I did till now is "sighing" like 'adoi' , 'haai' , 'huuhhh' and ' haaaa'
Aren't we suppose to feel a bit calm and have a little peace in our soul in this holy month?
Sometimes i wonder in my life..what are the things that've been bothering me lately...I often been asked by peoples out there, but when it comes to answer it, I was speechless and don't know where to start..
The best answer I could come out is " Owh, it's nothing, I'm doing good, I'm fine" but my face shows the other way round..

What should I do now..I think it's the habit of mine, always keep things to myself and in the end it just getting worst (sighing)

What the heck...
Every problem has its solution, and I need to figure out what's mine and solve it..

Haiiiii, adoi?!

Monday, August 24, 2009

'Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One'

I often wondering on how to get start on a new life.. How to make a new move.. How far can I go..
Whenever I think about it, it gets me nowhere.
People will easily say " It's simple, just go for it, do what you wanna do, don't hesitate to change your life cuz life itself won't wait for you.."
Ha ha, how I wish I have the guts to do so!
Furthermore, my mum has been nagging me about my 'life'. I mean my social life, my love life, my working life and ect. Hello..?!
I'm 25, and considering that fact, I don't think I'm cut out in a relationship stuff..
Just a few months back I was telling myself that I should just forget about this whole relationship thing and just concentrate on other stuff like works and spoiling myself. Plus I was overly stressed with the fact that I'm not so attractive with the current figure of mine.. Who will want to think of having a relationship with someone when you feel so not atractive with your ownself..Think about it.
It makes me hurt deeply inside when peoples are comparing me with my younger sister.. Of course she's pretty and attractive. That's what makes me scared to have any relationship with anyone, it's because of this reason.
After my ectopic tragedy in 2006, I'm scared of having a relationship with just any guys
Because everyone I know (especially guys) , will fall for my sister..

How pathetic my life is.. I'm such a hopeless person.. :(

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Owh..Work and work *sigh*

So here I am, trying to read up on "stuff I should know" as an engineering graduate.. And I go, "hey I know this", or perhaps "I've seen this before.. "And yes, I've learned about them, took exams on them, wrote papers on them".. But what do they all mean?

I rack my brains and can't remember what role they played in the whole equation.. Sad isn't it? But there u go.. A waste of a 3-yr diploma study. And I believe I'm not alone on this one.. How many of u read the paper, magazines, or even watch tv and go on saying "Hey, I learned about this before!" but when asked about it, u don't know a single thing!

So, back to the story, I received a huge blow on my face yesterday at the workplace. I felt threatened and insecured and insulted. Why?

Because, there's this new candidate who's going to fill in the post as a structural engineer..
She is about the same age as me, going to sit nxt to me, and supposingly I have to work together with her.. I can accept that kind of arrangement, but the only thing that I could not or do not agree is when my boss made this statement " She's clever you know, and the way she talk is very impressive" Wow?

What's that supposed to mean? Should i think that he was trying to boost my self estimation by making out the statement or it's the other way of saying " Hey, you are not like her"
What I don't really understand, how can people judge the others from 1 time meeting session..?
Maybe he was impressed with the way she conducted herself during the interview..
I need to plan out a strategy,I think..
From the positive view, maybe what he meant was ' Prove to me you can do better"

To think back, It's good when you have this kind of rivalry thing at the work place. It wakes you up from dreaming and brings you back to reality of what we called ' LIFE' .. I should be doing okay, i guess. It's a healthy competition for me, maybe after this, who knows, I might turn out to be a better person, more wiser than before with a positive mind and working attitude.
It feels good to say these words, isn't it?

So, about the strategy..I will think about it (sighing) <--too lazy too think of any right now, ha ha!

Friday, August 21, 2009

Do you speak English or not? Your Malay sounds funny!

So here I was sitting at home with conjunctivitis, and wanted to share my experience with another airline: But it got me thinking, why am I so critical on airlines? I reread my blog entries (from my other blog account), and most are on airlines, and I just realize how I wrote back then and now are kind of different..

That's when I came to the conclusion: My English is getting worse!
Oh well.. Must be from lack of practice and use. Huhuhu.. The other day also, I was chatting up with a new found friend of mine from Kuching,Sarawak, and we spoke in Malay Sarawak. I keep on making mistakes in the conversation. So I changed my medium to English.. This is so against my principal but what to do? If I speak in English, it'll be mostly English, and no mistakes.

So as a personal observation I think I can only speak Malay to family members and maybe old friends who I'm comfortable with. Speaking Malay is so hard especially with people u just met, what's with how to address urself and other people. Whether to use I/U, aku/kau, saya/awak, or the 3rd person calling thingy.. Arghh, so confusing!

Oh, and I was also chatting up with a friend from Hokkaido,Japan. I told him "Hey,I got red eye". Now.. how Malaysian is that? As supposed to " Hey,I have the red eye"? LOL! Oh no, my English is getting more Malaysianized by the day!!

I guess I'm embracing my culture and language by the day then.. I just hope my English and Malay won't be too bad in a few months and years to come!

Am I addicted to Facebook?

What do I do the first thing I get to the office?I switch on the computer and get on facebook!
Like OMG, am I that pathetic?
What is the first site I go to once I open up Mozilla? Facebook of course..

What do I do on Facebook? What does one do on Facebook for hours a day?

LOL... It's sad isn't it, when the high points of my day would be having notifications on Facebook!
So, quick note to self for 2009/10: Don't Facebook!!

More new resolutions... Do I have any? Oh yeah, I want to be those super skinny Kate Moss model type, but I love food too much to actually get there! Oh well, and I'm too cheap to go spend money on a new wardrobe! GOSH!!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Just a small thought on my mind

I couldn't sleep.. so I was thinking ( a new habit i've adopted recently) maybe I should start writing again..It's been awhile since the last time i do this blog-ging things..
So, this is the thing which came across my mind .....

1# it hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but
what is the most painful is to love someone and never finding the
courage to let the person know how you feel.

2# maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before
meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right
person, we should know how to be grateful for that gift.

3# love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, the
romance- and you find out you still care for that person.

4# a sad thing about life is that when you meet someone who
means a lot to you only to find out in the end that it was never
bound to be and you just have to let go.

5# when one door of happiness closes, another opens but often we
look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has
been opened for us.

6# the best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch,
swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like
that was the best conversation you've had.

7# its' true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it,
but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing
until it arrives.

8# giving someone all your love is never an assurance that
they'll love you back! don't expect love in return, just wait for
it to grow in their hearts but if it doesn't, be content it grew in

9# there are things you love to hear but you would never hear
it from the person whom you would like to hear it from, but don't
be deaf to hear it from the person who says it with his heart.

10# never say goodbye when you still want to try - never give
up when you still feel you can take it - never say you don't love
that person anymore when you can't let go.

11# love comes to those who still hope even though they've been
disappointed, to those who still believe even though they've been
betrayed, need to love those who still love even though they've
been hurt before.

12# it takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to
like someone and a day to love someone - but it takes a lifetime
to forget someone.

13# don't go for looks' it can deceive; don't go for wealth - even
that fades away. go for someone who makes you smile coz' only a
smile makes a dark day seem bright. hope you find that person.

14# there are moments in life when you really miss someone that you
want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real! hope you
dream of that someone.

15# dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what
you want to be cuz you have only one life and one chance to do all
the things you want in life.

16# may you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials
to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope
to make you happy and enough money to buy me gifts :)

17# always put yourself in other's shoes. if you feel that it hurts
you, it probably does hurt the person, too.

18# a careless word may kindle strife; a cruel word may wreck a
life; a timely word may level stress; a loving word may heal and

19# the beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly
themselves, and not to twist them with our own image - otherwise,
we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.

20# the happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of
everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along
their way.

21# happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who
have searched and those who have tried. for only they can
appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives.

22# love starts with a smile, develops with a kiss and ends
with a tear.

23# the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten
past, you can't go on well in life until you let go of your past
failures and heartaches.

24# when you were born, you were crying and everyone around you
was smiling - live your life so that when you die, you're smiling
and everyone around you is crying..